I was talking on the phone with a really good friend from when I was ten or so, and I guess we kind of drifted in terms of our interests or talking ever. But the thing that really struck me was how I was so scared of not being best friends one day. Sure there's still a certain fondness that I fell but I mostly really just don't care.
It's hard to go back home where my bros all know how rude it is not to preempt every compliment with "no homo"
So I went home and then I stayed there for almost a whole year, during which no one called me. And then I showed up at a party and suddenly fuck me because nobody ever sees me. I'd be fine with never talking, I mean one time I missed them but I mostly just wish they wouldn't hold this old thing over me like we having a history must be family cause it's
hard to say that's so, when my family never belittled or made me feel bad for what I'm good at.
Goon squad no more.
I'm a little people pleaser, I want you to love me, I want to be better always. So I've been looking for the lowest possible cleanly common denominator. It might seem somewhat unrelated, but there's a correlation between hygiene and keeping friends who frankly take too many showers, make too many excuses for not being human beings.
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